Monday, September 04, 2006

Of Wind(ig) and Bad Moods

Today is one of the windiest days I have so far expericened. It is particularly windy here in Germany, as far as I can reason. Today readers you unfortunately find me in poor spirits. I think it comes from lack of sleep and perhaps a guilty conscious. This weekend there was a huge party here in Altes Lager, one I did not attend. It was quite the event, with spot lights and loud music which played continuously from 10PM Friday until 3PM Saturday. And again from 10PM Saturday until 8PM Sunday. It was loud and obnoxious and put me in quite poor spirits. Then on Sunday evening a few kids from the School I teach at kept ringing the bell to my room, which is obnoxious. My patience was thin as I was feeling sick, tired and cranky. So I went and at first was civil, but they then started to take other peoples mail, and seeing as they don’t know English I stuttered in German telling them not to mess with it. They didn’t listen, they only laughed. Annoyed I left their presence muttering in anger. They then proceeded to ring the bell again, just as a thought a nap might be possible, and they rung it for some time. I went out and they began running over me with their bikes. I took it amicably and final told them I was feeling sick and needed sleep and left them. Sometime later they called again and I was annoyed and went down and yelled in English for them to leave me alone, please, I was feeling sick. And I was feeling sick too. But since I have felt bad for being short with them. Though it really was their fault. I’m too hard on myself I know but the whole thing made me feel bad as a person. I think it is just that all the stress of where I am has finally caught up to me and I am finally feeling homesick and alone here. You really start to miss English when it is so far from available. I know that things will get better, I will feel better, and get sleep soon. But I hate to be alone. Times when I felt like this I could only manage sleep by staying up very late or sleeping on my friend from colleges couch. Those options are really readily available to me here seeing as my college friend is half a world a way, as is his couch, and I have to get up very early, so that staying up late is a bad idea. Plus there is nothing with which to occupy my attention with at so late an hour. Thus here I am found in my present state. Please send me love, it will find ample reception during these next few difficult days. I promise to attempt to return to my usual jovial self soon.


At 12:51 AM GMT+2, Blogger Maria said...

so the kids already figured out where you live? well you know I can relate to that! However it sounds like it was easier to get rid of them in the convent. I hung out there by myself today while doing laundry and catching up on my reading, it was so weird!

Well you already said that you know things will get better, so I will just reinforce that. Louisville misses and loves you!

At 1:55 AM GMT+2, Blogger dan of becks mills said...

i bet i know the names of those kids...basti and sara? i enjoy your writings...they bring me back...yes, even back to the poopy times. like some good country singer probly has said "keep on truckin".

At 8:57 AM GMT+2, Blogger Schlaumayerle said...

Hey Keith,

Rachel gave me your blog addy, so I have been reading your "book", and she encouraged me to comment and make you aware of the fact that most German bells have a button to switch them off. It depends a little on how modern they are and each works different, but if you look around you might find it. If not you might find the fuse. And if the kids notice that it isn't working anymore they'll get bored. (hopefully) :-) If you have a bell that has a Telefon attached to it so you can ask who's outside it should be easiest. Anyway, hang in there, things will get better and I think it is great that you can evaluate yourself so well, it really helps to know that not feeling well is because you are homesick and stuff. Because most people aren't aware of that and it makes the treatment much harder... You could also invite the kids in next time and ask if they came to learn English, they might leave right away then ;-)
So, I hope you feel better soon, make sure to wear a scarf, the wind will get stronger... Germans really believe in scarfs!! Alright then, see you at the conference in 3 a few weeks!!

At 3:56 AM GMT+2, Anonymous Liz said...


i've been reading your wonderful posts and stories. i must confess to only getting to it every other week or so. but i think it's better this way, like hoarding them to have all at once :o)

hopefully the difficult days have moved on, at least for now, but i send much love anyway, of course.

i'd really like to get your address at some point. i'm quite partial to sending letters.


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